Being a Gemini I think a lot, probably way more than I should. I have a tendency to “over think” everything and I rarely go into any given situation unprepared. On one of my most recent mind journey’s I was thinking about this “love thang.” Not so much like, love is a bed of ruby red roses type thing but, something along the lines of what makes it work.
The old heads used to tell us that love took work but they never really went into detail of “how” to make it work. Hell, I still don’t know, but while I was thinking about it something interesting crossed my mind. We go through life searching, hoping to find that special someone. The person that you believe will sweep you off of your feet. The person that will make everything bad in your life somehow magically disappear. Unfortunately, in that quest for love, we go from one damaged relationship to the next, trying desperately to not drag our old baggage into the next euphoric and delusional fantasy. Along the way we make love to multiple people, giving ourselves physically to them freely, leaving with them bits and pieces of our hopes and dreams… our joys and pain… our fantasies and nightmares… believing… desperately wanting to believe that this new entity in our lives will hold our secrets close to them. Then POOF! They’re gone…
What ultimately happens over the course of time is that we become numb to the thought of an everlasting love even being remotely reachable. And then it happens!! You stop looking and he/she comes into your life melting the ice surrounding your heart helping you to feel again. Two souls that received the exact same advice at the exact same time, “stop looking, the right man/woman will find you when the time is right.” A wonderfully beautiful time that you can’t believe is actually happening to you, but there is a problem. You’ve given freely for so long, never asking for anything in return. You’ve shared when you knew full well that you should keep your mouth shut and now that you’ve found that someone who sends you to sleep with a smile on your face and who makes you anxious to start the next day, you’re unable to give yourself to them freely and wholeheartedly. Why? Because you’ve given so many small and seemingly insignificant pieces of yourself to all of the wrong people for so long that your mind and heart convinces you that somehow someway, you are cheating this magnificent person that God blessed you with. I mean you’ve given and left 5% here, 10% there, another 35% here (that one lasted awhile). How can you give 100% if you have yet to fill your tank to its original 100%? Trust and believe, though, all of the advice that you heard growing up was indeed true: ‘looks don’t last forever’, ‘beauty comes from within,’ etc etc. Yeah, it all plays a major part in our shaping – whether positive or negative.
I guess what I’m trying to say is, as adults we owe it to the young one’s coming up behind us to let them know that everyone isn’t worthy of having… Pieces of their Dreams.
Written by: Dean “Mr. Blacc topp” Swift